Searching for God knows what??

Well, hello, friends and family! Long time no write on the 'ole blog! Let me start off by saying I'm GOING HOME THIS WEEKEND! YEAH! My great grandma died last Friday, and her funeral is Saturday morning. It's sad, but happy, too. She was so ready to go "home" to heaven, she led a rich and full life, dancing and singing to the end, and went peacefully at the age of 98. How much better can you go? So it is joyous, family gathering together to celebrate, well, to celebrate family! And such great timing! I was starting to miss home so much that I've been eating the things that remind me of home, like honey drizzled over cheerios and milk, I made chicken just like my Grandma does the other day, just for me!, and I even got a maple donut at Dunkin Donuts before choir practice because that's what I always got when my church friends and I would hit up Hyvee for donuts before sunday school. How strange am I? I know, I know. Anyway, who knew that I would miss home so much, when I haven't even lived there for 5+ years? geez! But I do, and I'm pumped to go home, even though it's just for the weekend. Yeah!
The other thing that's going great, is my mission that I started when I was in Jersey 2 weekends ago. That weekend, I started the Great American Friend Hunt. "What is this, the Great American Friend Hunt?" You ask. Good question! The great american friend hunt is something I dreamed up, after lamenting about my current friend-less situation with Cherie and Cindi down in Jersey. You see, when you're a nanny, you don't have co-workers. You work 12, sometimes 14 hour days (for the record, I worked from 5 am to 7 pm last night. whooooooooooooo!) and after a long day, even if you have the energy to go out and do something, what do you do? I basically joined everything my church has to offer, but that left me wondering... are these my only options? Are these 10 people my age my only options for friends here in New York? What if they're not cool? They don't think I'm cool? They don't think I'm funny? (Not that I've met anyone who shares this opinion, but I may someday hahahaha) The thing is, an independent girl like me can survive doing things solo for a long time. I've had the time of my life exploring the city, going to movies and out to dinner, and doing whatever strikes my fancy at any moment that i'm not watching the little ones. But then one day, it just suddenly got old. Ok, I thought, now is the time. Time to make friends. Anyway, so that weekend, after talking to the ladies about it, it started to sound more like an exciting mission than just the plight of a loser college graduate. So I started searching. In the past two weeks, I went to a new church service for young people, I joined online clubs about things like surfing, backpacking, and child-rearing, and I even facebook searched campus crusade alumni here in New York. Also, I found out that the local community college has 1 credit art classes in summer, and I'm checking that out as well. The results? I made one friend via facebook who I'm going to have coffee with soon, a couple friends from the young people's group at church that I hung out w/ afterwards at a bar/ restaurant, and my friend Jodi that lives in the city is pumped about my surfing and backpacking clubs and we're going to go with the club out to Long Island this summer. Pretty good, huh? It's so weird, having to be proactive with friendships, because they come so easily to me. Wherever I've lived, I've always got that thick-as-thieves group that's got my back and understands my witty banter. But it's different here, I'm starting from scratch! I have to convince total strangers that I'm cool! And I'm really not! Anyway, so it's been a successful couple of weeks.
You might be wondering why I haven't written about my little munchkins lately. Well, I guess it's because the things that were funny at first, like the vomiting and the weird things I found myself doing, they've become normal now. I don't even blink at my hand smelling like poo an hour after changing a diaper, I just squirt some of my antibacterial hand gel (thanks Crystal, I take it everywhere) and go on. Funny things do happen, like the other day when I said "Hey Buddy, come over here, I need to change your dipe" and he ran around the house yelling "NO DIPE! NO DIPE!" Or early this week, I was checking out my friend Kinzi's pictures on facebook, and he looked at the picture and said "Mommy?" To which I said "Haha, no, that's not Mommy, that's just some Asian lady." So funny. I guess after you've been watching them for awhile, you don't appreciate those small things anymore? The great thing is, the kids are great. I mean, great great great. The 2 year old is truthfully, one of my favorite people in my life. He's so funny and loving and full of life. He woke up crying from a nap, so we ended up taking a nap together on the couch with my big comforter covering us up. Do you have any idea how great that feels? To cuddle up with a little person that loves you enough to settle down just being in your arms? Love it. They are great. I really can't complain, I guess I've trained him well because when there are problems, I discipline and fix them and he listens to me. He listens! And does what I say! It's awesome! And he's such a helper, he loves to help me, well, except for laundry, which he says is "TOO HOT!! TOO HOT!" :) The baby's getting big, but his smile is soooo precious, he doesn't really even need to be entertained lately, he is happy to just be within a 3 foot radius of me, and watches my face and movements. It's great, because as long as I'm close by, I can really be doing anything! And he thinks it's entertaining! So yeah. I love them! I really do.
As far as the City, it's beautiful in Spring. Truly gorgeous, all the parks and flowers. I love Central Park in the summer, I sat on the same rocks that I sat at in the winter overlooking the skating rink, and just sat and read for a bit on Saturday. Sadly, I was distracted the whole time by the fact that I'm pretty sure I had layed down in some dog pee at the park I had been hanging out in before, Bryant Park. It was so weird, the spot was wet, but I assumed it was from irrigation and thought nothing of it. Then for the rest of the afternoon, I was smelling wet dog! On me! The next day I asked Allie, the dog-walker, where the dogs pee and turns out pretty much wherever they want, so it's probable that my suspicions are correct. DARN IT ! YUCK! Good thing I washed it, because that's my only puffy vest and one of my favorite wardrobe pieces. Anyway, things are good. I'm heading home tomorow, the season finale of the OC is on tonight, and I'm finishing up a wonderful Diet Coke. What more could a girl want? The only thing on my mind that's not getting worked out is what's next. "I keep moving all around the country looking for something, but I don't even know what it is. Maybe I'll have some direction on where to go next once I find out what I'm even looking for."

This was a thought I had today while driving, it pretty much sums up my life right now, I've been here for almost 6 months, and trying to decide what to do after my year is up. Stay? Go? Home? Colorado? (that's my newest idea) What to do? Where to go? Anyway I really don't know. Any suggestions are welcome, job offers, wedding proposals, etc. HAHAHA. just kidding, just kidding. Remember, Grandpa Nichols, I'm marrying that guy I worked out behind at the gym :) Haha. Ok, well love you all,

christina