Big Apple, Little Apple

Went into the city again yesterday- New York City, the Big Apple. First stop Grand Central, then New York Public Library, which is like a big gorgeous museum- but a weird library cause you find the book you want, then tell a librarian and go into a "reading room" which is a huge vaulted magical rool of books. You sit there, and a librarian finds you and gives you the book.. and finds you at a specific seat. It reminded me of the pharmacy when you let them know what you need then you sit and wait for them to call your name with your perscription. Nichols, your "Pride and Prejudice" is ready, please pick it up at the counter. And the thing about the books--you can't take it with you! they aren't a "lending library." hmm. never seen one of those before, but oh well. Anyway it's gorgeous. And they have the books I want, so that's nice.
As I was walking through central park, which is frankly, unspeakably magestic as it awakes from its winter slumber. Some of the partitions keeping people from the sleeping grass have been taken down, and the park is beginning to sprout a little green here and there. I love Central Park because its the great equalizer. Rich, poor, lifers, and tourist, work-outers, and stroll-byers all descend on the park on theis warm winters day. Actually, that's something that really takes some getting used to about this city. 2 steps from Cartier (a premier jeweler to the rich and/ or famous) you find a "15 postcards for a dollar" place (yep, I stopped there, some of you may be recieving these pricey fellas) A seedy Korean food joint, next to a trendy Soho clothing store where you'll spot celebrities and spend 500 bucks on a dress. In the meatpacking district, you've got raw meat and ... that's right! Couture fashion and exorbitant rents. Weird. But kinda cool, too.
The more often I come here, I realize the city really is pretty safe. Other than this really scary guy Jessie and I saw on the subway harrassing this lady, I've never been scared for my safety.
As I was walking through this tunnel at the North tip of Central Park, I realized, wow I really am living the dream here. I tell you what, folkds, the city will wear down your reasons to leave and make you fall in love.
I am inspired.
inspired to sew myself something interesting to wear
inspired to write
inpspired to paint
inspired to take weird pictures... of sunsets that only exist when I'm wearing my $5 fake Chanel sunglasses that I bought off the street.
The problem is, today is Sunday.
I am back in Port Chester, a significantly smaller apple.
Although a great town, it is altogether uninspiring. Here are bills to be paid, sleep to be had, tv to watch to turn off a tired brain tired of screaming children, the creativity in the air of Port Chester was stifled long ago by the daily grind.
but I realized yesterday as I rode the train back home that this, who I've become, the girl who just takes care of kids, goes to the gym, eats healthy, and goes to bed early, THAT'S NOT ME! I fear instead of doing interesting things and saying interesting things and reading interesting things, I just am getting by and living for the weekends when I can go to the Big Apple and really experience life.
Well, that's gonna change. I got a call tonight, I'm joining a bible study on Tuesday. which is good not only for fellowship but also social interaction- I fear that the whole "don't use it you lose it" is applicable for social skills, and I don't want that to happen at all! :) Also, I got out my sewing machine today. I'm going to buy some fabric and start designing some clothes- my friend Tina wants a dress, and by golly she'll get one. And I'm going to go buy some paint, and get some deep philosophical books from the library and not girly fluff. Katie, I think we had the right idea last semester when we didn't have a TV! It DID make us better people! We read the newspaper, we talked more to each other about our days. But having the option and not partaking, that is when strength is born. And the problem here is that i have the option to "relax" and "veg" to my hearts content. But I have a problem with that. see, I don't want life to pass me by and wish I would have lived more. So, that's it! I'm heading to bed and tomorow I'm going to try to use my relaxation to accomplish something, not just fill my head with fluff. :) good night friends!
thank you hal and judy for the email, and Shannon, Caroline, and Parents for the recent mail! And Bill, good luck with "Piston" I'm sure he'll do great and the sign will look amazing!
Katie Paulson, I miss you and love you and hope you're doing alright in the room without me! let's make a phone date!
love you all, friends!
christina